flashbulb memories

 they say

its emotion that makes the memory stick

a small still in your movie called life

one that you see in bizarre clarity - a perfectly still, suspended moment. 

some of you were flashbulbs

some simply didn't stay lit - but im not complaining

12 whole years in the making and it ends in 2 months. 

bittersweet? the nostalgia makes it seem so.

and as i look over the vast sea

the great tsunami of my moments, gone past

lighthouses pop up - a bright light of beckoning

a gentle pull, not unlike the squeeze of a hand against mine

i allow myself to 

be

be dragged, waves lapping against the ship

a smile i didn't know existed, lingering on my face

for despite all my

trials and tribulations

for when i mistook the joyful welcoming as

a raging wrath of record

i apologise.

alone on my bed, typing away to fulfill those requirements

requirements keeping my future secure

in healthy, happy, good hands as they say

my final bulb that i look out for:

the coming moment grounds me.

a cap on my head, a folder in my hand

tears in my eyes, and a reminder

a simple plain ticket, a last goodbye

flashbulbs i have yet to be blinded by

the thought is

aching in a good way.

my flashbulbs memories light the way,

a fairy godmother,

that i can't wait to see again.