s*lf h*rm

//TW//

//Mentions of s*lf h*rm, cutt*ng, bl**d and ab*se// 


She thought she didn't deserve anything. She thought she was worth less than a grain of sand on the beach. Maybe if she put herself through pain, she could justify her life. She pulled the lighter out, the flame dancing in front of her eyes. 

They hid under the table, yells still echoing in their ears. The door locked, r*zor in arms reach. Bruises covered their arms, thighs, face and in every other place. Screams ringing in their ears, they dragged the jagged edge on their skin, blood a reward or a punishment - they couldn't decide.

Ey downed the entire bottle. Dizzy, sweaty and confused, ey continued to drink. One shot, two shots, three shots, ey lost count. Pushing eir concerns away, ey lost emself to the influence. The world, while a little blurry, was more tolerable this way.

He couldn't bear it anymore. He didn't eat, he didn't sleep. He did nothing but lay in bed, paralyzed. and yet, he didn't get help. So long as he wasn't drawing blood, he wasn't "bad enough" or "sad enough". and who was he to suggest otherwise? And even if he did, would people listen? Would people care?

Xe picked at xer skin, nails, hair. Xer parents yelled at xem to stop. It was all xey could do to feel alive again. But how would they understand that? Xey knew it was wrong, guilt and shame burned through every particle in xer body. But god, was it addictive.


If you are s*lf h*rming, suicidal, going through a rough patch or know someone who is, please get help. You are loved and you are valid. You're still here and I am proud of you! Stay strong! 

Suicide hotlines - 9152987821, 9820466726 


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